Budget Reconciliation, A.K.A. The Ninth Circle of Hell

Hello again!

Well, today is the day that I dread every month...the day I work on reconciling the budget for the center where I work.  As anyone who knows me even remotely well can tell you, I'm terrible at math and I despise it also.  It's different from science, which I'm also not good at but at least find some aspects of it interesting.  I really don't care anything about math.  I know that it has to exist, though.  I'm just glad that other people can take care of it.  The feeling is mutual, apparently, because ol' Math hasn't been the kindest to me over the years, either.  The worst grades I ever got in high school were in Algebra II, which I passed with a D, by the grace of God and Mrs. Kreye.  I actually don't see how I even passed because I got an F on literally every single assignment from the midterm exam on.  Every test, every small assignment, the final, EVERYTHING.  I really believe that Mrs. Kreye gave me the pass because she somewhat liked me and (more likely) because she didn't want to teach my dumb, math-denying ass again.  It certainly wasn't mathematically possible that I got anything above a 59 average for the year...but then again, how the heck would I know what's mathematically possible??

Anyway, I look forward to the beginning of every month the same way I look forward to a Pap smear (sorry for the sick reference, but it's the closest I could get to the feeling).  Every time I think I get it right, I get asked some question by my boss and I struggle for the answer, which makes it seem as if I don't know what I'm doing (and it seems that way because it's true).  I feel like I'm never going to get the hang of it...after all, I've been working here for over a year and I still have about the same amount of trouble as I did in the beginning.  It is the one aspect of my job that really makes me want to find something else.  In fact, I usually go through a frenzy of job searching around this time every month...it usually only lasts a day or so, though, and then I kind of regain some reason.  But it always comes right back the next time.  And you know what my favorite day of the month is (as far as work goes)?  The day after I complete the budget stuff for the month...because it's the longest amount of time between that day and when I have to do this crap again.

As most people who know me also know, I'm a Christian.  I'm not a churchgoer but I believe in most of the general tenets of Christianity.  I firmly believe in the traditional Heaven and Hell.  However, I was thinking that, if each person had their own personal Hell, mine would be sitting at a desk, permanently doing budget reconciliations and other mathematical enterprises.  I could never take a break and I would never be finished...that's enough to make me seriously renounce all the sinful things I've done and would ever do and immediately take up residence at the nearest convent.

Well, I should get back to it now...I think I'm just about done for this particular round of reconciling fun.  Which is to say, I'll probably be working on it for another day or so.